Board Thread:Season Rankings/@comment-24899664-20141222121159/@comment-26485526-20170511173054

Alright everyone! It is finally time to finish off my canon rankings!

2) Pearl Islands (7) - I don't need to say it, Pearl Islands was a near perfect season. It is beloved by the overall fan-base, and it is not hard to see why! It had fun and amazing characters throughout, there was flipping and blindsides all season long, and every single person plays some sort of role in the season itself! Jonny Fairplay was the perfect villain to cast this season, and he was alongside the perfect hero (lovable pirate, Rupert), as well as Queen Sandra, who was never afraid to call him out on his bullshit! The Drake tribe especially was amazing to watch, and over the first three episodes, you could call them the original Tandang! The tribe was full of amazing personalities that meshed so well together, and people on that tribe were constantly butting heads, yet they somehow went on an immunity run! Further, they only lost their first challenge when they got cocky and Fairplay decided to blindside Burton for being annoying. From there, Drake becomes Ulong as they go on a massive losing streak! Trish may have been robbed, but her blindside was iconic in the sense that she tried so hard to change the status quo to get rid of Rupert. Then the fight that followed between Rupert and Jon Rupert: Who voted for me? Jon: I did. Rupert: WHAT THE F***?! Jon: Dude, chill. Rupert: LOOK AT ME!! I SAID LOOK AT ME DAMMIT!! <3 <3

Also, who could forget Sandra and her hilarious and iconic quotes? "The lady I think liked her (Trish)... in a sexual way."; "I CAN GET LOUD TOO! WHAT THE F***?"; "Where's that snake motherf***er, Jon? I'll tell you, can nobody trust that bitch right there!" Jon was the original Russell Hantz, with the only difference being that he was actually funny and entertaining, despite being someone that you wished would get his head knocked off. The Fairplay vs. Sandra rivalry was just awesome to watch as well, even more so the further they got in the game. Another thing I love about that rivalry was when Sandra dumped the tribe's fish, Jon looked at her and yelled "Well you probably did it!" That then starts a screaming match between Sandra and Jon, and it gets to the point where it saves Sandra because everyone else decides to blame Christa! Then of course there was the loved ones challenge. Everyone remembers Fairplay's "Dead Grandma lie", but what is talked about less is how Sandra didn't give a shit about his dead grandma when she chose to have Fairplay's buddy move backwards on the platform anyway! Jon: There's a million questions that I'd like to ask about my grandmother, but obviously some people don't give a f***. Sandra: It's not all about you all the time! <3 <3

Then of course you have the Morgan tribe who just could not get their act together, losing every challenge and getting stripped of their bare essentials! Then all of a sudden, after Drake gets cocky and Morgan starts winning, Morgan now starts to become the cocky tribe, and this continues when the Outcasts return! Andrew Savage assumed the leadership role of the Morgan tribe and was being rude and condescending to people like Lill and Ryan S. the entire time. When the Outcasts come back, Lill flips and blindsides Savage, preventing his arrogant ass from being on the jury!! Once the merge hits, there are flipping and blindsides constantly, as I mentioned already, and this season never slows down! The best however was saved for the final five after Burton and Fairplay just assumed Sandra would blindly follow their lead. This mistake however, lead to one of Sandra's most iconic quotes "I'm gonna screw you aaaaannnnd Burton!", followed by Burton being blindsided for the second time! Finally, Sandra put on an amazing Final Tribal performance and ended up winning the game despite people like Fairplay constantly underestimating her and never giving her a chance!

All that being said, this season was NEARLY perfect, there were two incredibly minor things that prevent it from achieving the top spot on my list. The first was the Outcast Twist, which was although shocking, I don't like the idea of people coming back into the game unannounced after being voted out, especially since it screwed Shawn's game by preventing him from making the merge (which he would have done had the Outcasts not showed up), and would have screwed someone else's as well if Osten didn't quit. Speaking of which, my other slight issue was Osten's quit since Osten set a bad precedent this season that others would later follow when he quit at Tribal Council. While I didn't necessarily cut other seasons for people quitting (although it is the worst possible way to watch someone go out), the fact that Osten's quit was the first official one meant that it carried the most weight. That being said, those two minor issues with this season didn't necessarily leave a bad taste in my mouth about the season as a whole. The way I see it, they were merely tie-breakers that ultimately separated Pearl Islands from the season that achieved the top spot in my rankings.

Finally...

1) Gabon (17) - That's right people! GABON is the season I consider to be the best of all time! Gabon is one of those seasons that is very controversial. I feel like if you watch Survivor for the strategy, then Gabon may be quite low in your rankings. I have said this a couple of times before, but I watch the show purely for entertainment (although I admit good strategy would be nice). As I mentioned already, Gabon has some of the biggest personalities that have ever been cast on this show! It introduced us to Corinne, Randy, Crystal, Susie, and Susie among others! Gabon is such a clusterfuck of a season that hits the ground running and never slows down! In addition, each and every person this season has some sort of role to play! You had Kenny's awkward flirting with Michelle, Gillian being the lovable (but incredibly weak) old lady, and even Paloma had a mini rivalry with Ace prior to her elimination! Both Kota and Fang were incredibly fun to watch, but for completely different reasons! The Onion alliance ran the cliquey Kota tribe while Ace pissed off everyone else with his condescending attitude. Then you have the Fang tribe who just could not get along! Randy hated everyone, GC volunteered to be leader, then quit the next day, Crystal flopped at everything she claimed to be good at, etc.! Then of course you had the tribe switch! In fact, I would argue that this was the best tribe switch ever! The Onion alliance continued to dominate Kota, but this time, you had Dan (RIP) and Susie annoying them to no end! Once the tribe switch hit, Corinne's confessionals only got better! "I don't know if he (Dan) is a former fatty, or why he wasn't liked as a child..."; "So this moron (Susie) said that she'd like me to go. REALLY?! I hate her! I hate her, hate her, HATE HER! I really want to stab her in the face!" Corinne was the original Winona Kelly, she was not afraid to say what's on her mind, and a lot of the time, it was the kind of stuff that you were thinking about saying, but too afraid to say out loud! This applied to Randy as well, but especially Corinne! Over on Fang, that tribe just continued to go further and further downhill! Crystal continued to flop in challenges, Ace continued to piss people off, Kelly started to emerge as a likable underdog, GC stopped giving a shit (which lead to Crystal's iconic "Eat yo' rice" line) before asking his tribe to vote him off. Fang even gave us multiple blindsides with both Jacqui and Ace (especially Ace) going out in amazing fashion! Finally, there was the 2nd tribe switch which saw the cocky Marcus throw an idol in the ocean before being blindsided by Susie (just as it looked like the Onions were going to steamroll their way to the end)! By the way, those reactions to Marcus's blindside from his former allies, PRICELESS!!

Just when you think the season can't get any more exciting, the merge hits, and oh dear God! Sugar sticks it to the Onions once and for all by blindsiding Charlie. Even though Randy and Corinne going one after the other was predictable, those two episodes had plenty of chaos that made me not mind the predictable boot! In fact, the Tribal Council where Randy goes home is still looked at today as one of the most entertaining Tribals ever! Not only did Bob blindside Randy with his fake idol, but you had amazing voting confessional after amazing voting confessional! "This vote is not strategic, it is strictly personal!" "You have made my life HELL! From DAY. ONE! So forget you, GO home, GOODBYE!"; "You are a disgusting, old, hot-headed, chauvinistic, alcoholic bigot and you need to grow up before you die alone.....LOSER!"; "I'm voting you Susie because payback's a bitch!"

From there, the chaos continues as Kenny becomes paranoid about an idol, and freaks his alliance out by voting for Matty instead of Corinne in an effort to split the votes. This is then followed by Sugar giving her idol to Matty to blindside Kenny's ally, Crystal! Meanwhile however, Kenny's went from that socially awkward kid to having developed this huge ego by the end of the season! The Final Tribal Council was amazing as well, as the jury did not hold back what they felt about each finalist (Randy & Corinne especially)! While some people complain that Bob was a bad winner, I would argue that he was much better than Matty would have been had the latter won the fire-making tiebreaker! Besides, with Bob being the oldest winner of the series to date, I think it's quite fitting that this insane mess of a season gave us such an unexpected winner (seriously, who watched this season at any point and actually expected Bob to win until the Final Tribal?) Lastly, while I do admit that this season had a dark vibe to it, I have a bit of a dark and twisted sense of humour as it is, so I didn't mind that at all! Honestly, I could sing the praises of Gabon all day long! It is an just an unbelievably amazing season and I think it thoroughly deserves its place at the very top of my rankings.