Board Thread:Season Rankings/@comment-24584422-20180611085656/@comment-24584422-20180926055355

Since I know I'm the only one who will give this icon the writeup she deserves

Cut- Lisa Keiffer

434. Lisa Keiffer- Season 9- Vanuatu

Where to start with this often unappreciated mess of a hag? From the beginning, obviously Rob! So in the early days, Yasur was split down the middle between the "older women" and the "younger women" alliances, so that means Lisa was nestled into an iconic alliance with Scout, and Twila. Actually if you thought that you'd be WRONG. Delusional queen Lisa allied herself with the bowheads Mia, Eliza, Julie, and we all know Dolly was that all important swing vote. Anyway, that is delusional Lisa moment number 1. We then move onto our next ~incarnation of Lisa- hypocritical Lisa. After berating Eliza for flipping to vote out Dolly, Lisa does the very same thing at the next Tribal Council to avoid the tie and get Mia out of the game. What a shrew <3. Then comes the swap, and Lisa is UTR for an episode or two. In her boot episode she ~emerges~ into her final, and most iconic evolution- "over it all" Lisa. We all know the story, Lisa asks Ami where she finds the manioc "just in case," and Ami goes batshit and thinks Lisa is plotting against her and sends her home. But let's review some iconic Lisa moments in that episode.

Ranting and raving to confessional about Ami making her swear on a fake Bible that she is DONE with that.

(This is more of a Scout moment but Lisa's presence enhances it.) Scout: Can we vote out Liza? Ami: No I want to vote out Lisa, I don't trust her anymore. Scout: This Lisa? -Lisa is standing right there-

Her departing words "True to mah werd, true to mah werd," as if Ami gave two shits.

We stan a delusional queen.

Anyway Lisa's story didn't ~quite~ end there, she had a minor role in the series of events leading to Leann's blindside. Remember when the women are discussing if they should vote off Eliza before Chris, Leann worries about it breaking the principle of being an all women's alliance and eliminating the men before turning on the women. However, Scout helpfully brings up the fact "we voted off Lisa before we did Rory," when Scout never voted for Lisa. Queen of passive-aggressive jabs <3 Anyway that is more of a Scout moment but it is the ~legacy of Lisa~ living on.

And what more can you ask for a mid-premerge boot but to be a delusional, hypocritical shrew?

Save- Kelly Bruno :)